Terms+To+Avoid

toc This page will be regularly updated by YOU ... it will contain an increasingly specific list of what NOT to do when you write!Added September 14th, 2009 by ...

Emily Barns:
Avoid using words such as
 * "interesting"--has an ambiguous meaning
 * "weird"--many things can be described as "weird", what kind of "weird" is it?
 * "mention"--seems too casual. The author didn't "mention" something; the author always has a purpose!
 * "show"-- BLAH. Instead use:
 * neutral: depict, convey, demonstrate, portray, illustrate, displays
 * of high importance: emphasize, stress, highlight, underscore, epitomize, remind
 * sudden: reveal
 * for emotion: manifests, intensifies
 * for opposites: contrasts, contradicts, juxtaposes
 * "**this"**-- vague pronoun use! Never write "The author does //this// by..." The author does what by? To be more specific... use "this" when followed by a noun. e.g. "The author uses //this technique// to..." or "//This technique// highlights..." An ideal use of the word this: "Maya Angelou //concentrates// on the vivid descriptions and exaggerations of Mrs. Flowers. //This concentration..."//
 * // "talks about"-- Never say the author "talks about" something. He/she is writing, not speaking. Instead... //
 * "The author utilizes"
 * "The author discusses"
 * The author argues
 * (if necessary) "The author writes" **caution:** this verb has very high bland potential

Added September 20th, 2009 by ...

Tim Chen
When speaking (or writing for points 1 and 3), avoid words/phrases such as
 * "...bunch of", "sort of," "kind of," "kind of...not really." - Do not incorporate these phrases. Vague and elementary ways of saying similar to, to some extent, in a larger sense, the blah blah blah illustrates ambiguity. (Plus they tend to call attention to your lack of confidence / hesitation! - added by Mrs. Rosen)
 * "like," "it's like," and "stuff like that."-- common filler words. Vague and demonstrates lack of sophistication. Eliminate them!
 * "used"-- ok to use once, but then expand your vocabulary. Incorporate words like utilized, put forth, carried forth, adopted, employed, harnessed, rendered, and of course, incorporated. (use put forth and carried forth with care though -- they can end up sounding stuffy and like you're trying too hard! Added by Mrs. Rosen)
 * "...and yea" e.g. (Rodriguez expresses his conflicting feelings and emotions by portraying his mixed background, //**and yea**//. -- yea what? (or Mrs. Rosen's SO WHAT?) unnessesary and makes you sound like you have more to say when you are really just finishing an incomplete phrase or thought.

A Hanging Essay, things to avoid:
 * it's not "different than" it's "different FROM"
 * you need to give support for any generalizations, you can't just say "There is a sardonic tone", you must explain why
 * avoid using pronouns.. specify
 * don't second guess the author, ie he could/should have put straight description, but rather "unlike straight description, narration allows..."
 * don't say, he would blah blah, use past tense
 * don't start the essay with the end of the passage, start from the beginning
 * avoid awkward long sentences
 * avoid the passive voice
 * do not contradict yourself
 * don't add new arguments in the conclusion
 * don't use the same example twice
 * don't use vague words
 * don't use fragmented sentences
 * don't say "as previously mentioned", it reveals your bad organization
 * don't say continuously, say repetitively or "every paragraph opens with..."

Added October 18, 2009 by ...

David Huang
A list of things to avoid while writing analytical essays:

Terms:
 * "Perfect" - evidence from the text either proves or disproves your point. You can't prove something perfectly.
 * "Quote" - waste of ink; the reader will know if you are talking about something you have just quoted. "Quote" is also a very bland word.
 * "Continuously" - vague; i.e.: "The dog continuously licks the prisoner's face." Does the dog spend a small part of the narrative licking the prisoner's face without stopping? Or does the dog spend the whole narrative licking the prisoner's face? Always be specific.
 * "In this essay..." - the reader already knows that you are talking about "this essay", there's no need to waste ink like this.
 * "Also" - Starting a sentence with "also" sounds immature and unorganized.

Techniques:
 * Don't give only a single example
 * Listing - avoid including evidence or ideas in a laundry list. This method of presentation is elementary and will inevitably cause your essay to sound rigid.
 * Repetition without effect - like laundry listing, repetition without effect causes the essay to sound elementary and boring. Mix up your sentence structures and vocabulary.
 * Begging the question - "The dog jumped up and licked the prisoner's face." What dog!? Instead, use "a dog".
 * Starting a sentence with a quote
 * Mixing up your tenses - ALWAYS write in the present tense.
 * Restating (parroting) the prompt - If someone is reading your essay, they know the prompt already.
 * Unintentional run-ons
 * Vague or little distinction between the author and the speaker
 * Analyzing without support - nobody will believe you if you present radical ideas without any support. As long as you support your answers, you are always correct.
 * Stating the given - i.e.: "The author uses narrative techniques to convey his purpose of writing the essay." Similar to restating the prompt, you are merely wasting ink when you state the given.
 * Bringing up more support in the conclusion - support belongs in the body paragraphs. The conclusion should sum up your points, not bring up more ideas.

Avoid Incorrect Format
 * Use quotes for a short story or essay title. "Title"
 * Underline for a "long" passage's title. A "long" passage can be described as a book or any piece that is composed of smaller parts. e.g. A newspaper, a compilation of essays, etc.

December 1st.
 * Sophie Lin**:

Avoid...
 * "the author uses diction ." (It says nothing. Instead opt for " loaded words" "technical words")
 * choosing "speaker" over "author" too many times if the author herself isn't in the piece as, say, a younger voice
 * the word "saying"
 * using ellipses unless the quote cannot stand on its own
 * using the brackets [ ], (better to manipulate quote into quote bursts)
 * over referencing the "reader" and "writer" and "audience" (a little obvious, take it out, say it directly)
 * trying to write slanted when a title is in italics in the prompt (underline it. it's a book)